I have lost my material things so many times in my life and I have had to start over from nothing. They were just things. Clothes, furniture, things like that. You can get those things replaced by going to Goodwill and Salvation Army and yard sales.

I had my daughters and myself and that was all that mattered. God would provide me with the rest. I never begged for anything, I made due with what I had. I worked two jobs to support myself and my two daughters. It was just the three of us. But we made it.

I see people who use others for their own gain. They use people to get things. And they do not feel any guilt whatsoever. The only hard part they put into anything is, the begging and the guilt trips. I am not like that. I can sleep at night knowing that I worked for what I wanted. I earned what I got.

I never lied to get anything either. I have never cheated anyone to get something. I have never bullied a person to get a thing. I can honestly say that my conscience is clean. I am honest.

It took me five years to get my SSDI because I did it honestly. I never lied about anything. Even when I was raising my daughters by myself, I never collected welfare because I was not going to be a statistic. (teenage mom on welfare). Not once, even when I was struggling, did I seek out the aid of the state.

So, I am attempting to create this campaign to obtain this wonderful contraption that will assist me in building up my muscles. It will liberate me with my mobility. I will be able to get out of the wheelchair and away from the rollator. I will be able to build up my muscles and my lung capacity.

My goal is to get back to driving myself to my appointments again and going to places that I used to before MS slowly robbed me of them. I aim to get back some of my independence and freedom back. Hell just making it to the bathroom in time would be awesome!!!

But do I need to release all of my contacts from each of my emails to the campaign in order to get things started? I don’t want to pressure my friends to donate because I know that times are tough for them. Plus I don’t want to know who does or doesn’t want to be included or involved in this adventure.

Yet am I denying those who may want to help me with this?

I wonder if I should just save up to get it? Just like I have always done. If I had wanted something, I would save for it. I never had a credit card nor did I go in debt for it. I saved the money. It would take months or years but I would save. I never begged or borrowed money from anyone. I never owed anything to anyone.

My MS isn’t going anywhere so I have plenty of time to save. I have nothing but time. And besides, I will not be harassing anyone in the process.

What to do, what to do…….🤔